I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
Randomize
