I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
i just threw up in front of the washington monument. such a scenic puke.
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
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