My biology professor just used the phrase "dick fairy" in a sentence. No, it didn't make more sense in context.
You kept saying thank you to the automatic toilet as it flushed your puke.
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
I'm drinking beergaritas with a dog who is high and a baby
your completely serious
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
Its 9 am & i've been cleaning for 6 hours now with occasional crying bursts and two cocktails. Adulting 101.
It finally happened. Some guy just tried to catfish me with my own dick pic. Of course I told him that it was the hottest dick I'd ever seen and that I would do anything for that particular dick.
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
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