Rock
Scissors
Fuck
im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
Within the span of 10 minutes, I managed to make a slip 'n slide on his stomach, threatened to pee on him, kneed myself in the eye, and almost fell asleep on the toilet....in that order.
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
She said I'm like warm bathroom-sink water. There's nothing necessarily wrong with me, but she doesn't exactly want to "drink me in"
Sometimes in life you just have to realize the security deposit isn't worth it.
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
It's Friday you fucking nerd of course I'm drunk.
all I want for my birthday is booze and sex toys. don't bother calling if neither of those are included.
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
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