youre lurking in front of me
Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
I think I'm going to inject the gummy vitamins with vodka
I'm glad you're using your medical degree for some good for once
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
We ran out of wine so we are trying the absinthe you brought over from Spain like 3 years ago. Please call me at noon tomorrow. If we die, its your fault
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
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