it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME
Randomize
