yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
rethinking that breast reduction surgery... i'm tired of drunkenly explaining the scars to guys who don't really give a shit
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
Checked my bank account this morning...apparently I went to 7-11 at 4am and spent $22 on taquitos. New all time low for me.
I ate all of them. New all time low for ME.
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
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