It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
I took a bird feeder and filled it with alka-seltzer. Can you say fireworks?
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
i think the bruises are from the grocery store. on separate occasions. i've been spending a lot of time drunk at the market lately.
i have a vague recollection of being in the parking deck around 4 this morning, and on monday morning i was naked on the roof.
that would mean it's on tape
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
Thou shall not celebrate other people's birthdays as if they were thy own
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
Glad I can drunkenly remember to not get tomatoes on my Mexican pizza but can't tell a guy to keep his hands off my ass
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
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