your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
i just google imaged poop.
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
You rang?
Saw a ginger and the first thing I thought of doing was yelling "you have no soul!" so I called you so we can yell it together with you on speakerphone.
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
I want you to come over here and spit coffee in my mouth like a momma bird feeding a baby bird. That hung over.
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
I thought I needed to get laid. Turns out I just needed pasta.
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
Seriously though, I walked in and he was holding my cat in the air singing "the circle of life"...
Randomize
