If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
I gotta stop tellin complete strangers at the bar that they're the godparents to my first born
2 rounds of irish car bombs have already been taken to your 5 year sober anniversary
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
He ate me out while I finished season 1 of Stranger Things. If that's not a modern day relationship goal, then I don't know what is.
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
Is texting an old booty call with "can you still get your ankles behind your ears?" an appropriate way to reemerge into the singles scene???
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
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