im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
Awkwardly walking by your fuck buddy and waving a casual hi in his direction like nothing has happened is probably the best thing in my life
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
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