We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
In hindsight, the torn ligament in my knee is probably the fault of the ginbucket and jager bombs starting at 3pm. I guess I'll stop blaming it on you.
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
So much Jack, so little girl.
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
I need to align my fucking chakras
Fuck you. Fuck this party. I just wanted to be pretty with a cute little tiara and boys sucking my tits, now i have a hangman game drawn on my face and jello shots in my hair.
I wanted to give you a great birthday party. You know I did.
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
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