the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
I need you to come over. Im crying, day drinking and working out simultaneously.
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
Randomize
