i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
Ended up passed out drunk in the neighbors lawn, still in costume. Neighbors thought I was a lawn decoration. Ten points for best Halloween ever.
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize