Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
He just pushed one of his testicles up into his stomach and called himself lance armstrong. I can't make this shit up.
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
i only stock magnum condoms so if the guy i bring home doesn't fit in them he only gets to eat me out. no exceptions.
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
Decided to stop by the store on my walk of shame. I must really look like shit, a six year old girl just walked up to me and said "my mommy wanted me to tell you Jesus loves you." Thanks kid.
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