Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
Remind me to tell you about the dream where im a fighting a super hero whose only weakness is sunkist.
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
When you wake up, I have a unicorn coloring book, crayons, mini cupcakes, and booze.
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
Oh man
I hooked up with the lead singer of the band at the wedding. I am so hungover.
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
Randomize
