I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
How in the fuck did you get LIVE MOTHER FUCKING BATS!?!?! Into my ROOM last night????
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
Randomize
