Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
Also I can show up hungover, fall asleep at my desk, and smell like a bottle of whiskey, and they still like me more then my shitty co worker
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
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