fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
Dude... You called me at 3am to tell me you still had your pants.
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
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