She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
I need to keep a secret stash of instant alcoholic margaritas for when i deal with people. For example, right now, im grading, and I just don't fucking care any more. My students should make a thank you card for Jose Cuervo.
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.
Stay hydrated
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
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