I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
It's 2017. Get with the program. Also remind me never to get margaritas with you ever on Cinco de Mayo.
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
Randomize
