We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
So some girl kept staring at me and giving me these weird looks. That's when I realized she could probably hear the Mulan soundtrack playing on my iPod...
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
I should have known I was in trouble when you started pouring shots all over me
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
I need you to know I’m weirdly very sexually attracted to Charlie Puth now
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