can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
How do I know I'm high? Let me count the ways.
1. I put the milk in the cupboard, 2. Everything tastes fucking amazing, 3. My dog is really soft, 4. The lunesta butterfly flew out of my tv and touched me
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
I'm the Oprah of jello shots
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
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