he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
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