i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
I'd like to be surprised that there's a picture of someone pouring champagne in my boobs on Instagram, but I can't.
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
Just so you know, you called at 2 last night and kept making me tell you that I loved you and then when you got home you thanked me for walking you home. Incase you forgot, I'm still about 200 miles away.
Something is wrong here. The birds are chirping and I'm not fucking you, I'm not getting head and I don't smell bacon. Why am I up this early then?
Randomize
