If i come over, it means nothing
you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
I was so drunk i thought Kathy Griffin was funny
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
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