is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
nothing says happy new years better than a black eye from shooting yourself with a champagne bottle
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
Attn every girl I've slept with in the past 26 years of my life. One of you cunts gave me herpes. This is the 4th of 5 group MMS. That's right. It's in the 50s. There are two girls I don't have #s for. One was on a cruise and the other was a prostitute in Amsterdam. So which of you has herpes?
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
Randomize
