Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
This drunk lesbian I just met keeps trying to shove sushi in my mouth. Help.
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
Randomize
