it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
I stole a road cone for their 13 yr old son. Apparently I told him to put Christmas lights on it, and "treat her like a lady."
I hit her tiny dog with a horseshoe an hour ago. Her and her mom cried as it laid on the ground shaking. Im drunk.
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
I don't even know why im sitting in this office eating a poptart.
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
Randomize
