Everyone knows that the fastest route to a corporate advancement is to take a shot in the mouth
Why do bread and butter chips remind me of eating out your mom?
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
What if we had a smart house and we could just say "baked" and it would rain donuts?
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
Randomize
