Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
He called his prostate his "boner button".
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
I met this girl the other day and found out her boyfriend is a helicopter pilot. How the fuck do you compete with that.
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
Randomize
