she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Let's get this straight. I am six fucking feet tall. Do you even understand how limited my options in guys to date are? No. Did you see my last three boyfriends? I looked like a fucking giant next to them. So I will fuck this six-foot-seven Italian model even if I am the ugliest girl at this party because, goddammit, I deserve to.
Randomize
