My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
My sunday was babysitting three big, drunk, crying Swedes. Unless your day involved four or more giant drunk swedes I don't want to hear about it.
Randomize