Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
I'm wearing boardshorts as underwear to work. This is bachelorhood
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
I have whiskey and jager. There's no telling what kind of monster will emerge
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
I'm at that stage of drunk where just imagining having sex makes me motion sick.
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
Randomize
