you can't spend the night you always smell like dirty underwear and my roommates complain
i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
I'm very fluent in vodka, but that seems to be a whiskey dialect.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
My roommate was being an ass so I put everyone's drinks/shots on his tab for the entire night. Then when we left he was telling me how he got out cheaper than last time.
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
Randomize
