did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
He was crying because he hiccuped every time he kissed me. We then crawled to the kitchen because neither of us could stand, and I spoon-fed him peanut butter "to cure his ailment."
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
My purpose is to unleash drunk self on strangers, i believe as some terrifying icebreaker, otherwise i too would offer my driving services.
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
It's almost 5am and all I can keep thinking is IT'S WHISKEY TIME!!
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
Randomize
