that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
Why can't public transit accommodate my lifestyle of drinking til midnight on a Monday?
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
Don't forget to grab a pregnancy test and sloppy joe mix for tonight
You took acid last night and I’m up early to go to the grand opening of a new TJMaxx by my house. We couldn’t be more perfect.
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
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