i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
I said ACK before Andy Samberg made it even remotely funny. That tool is stealing all my lines.
Yeah, you've definitely been jizzing in your pants years before he made it socially acceptable
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
I just closed two deals on my laptop from my bathroom while smoking a bowl, like a bawssss. Working from home is my favorite.
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
I believe the only reason I am slightly functional right now is the leftover drugs in my nose that I keep sniffing
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
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