I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
Also, McDonald's breakfast is now 24/7. This is it. This is how I die. Face first in a pile of hashbrowns.
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
The sex was so good I feel like I could run a triathlon, hit big at the casino, and defeat ISIS.
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
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