Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
I literally just biked home like I was on the last leg about to win the tour du France. Fuck diarrhea
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
Sunburned by dick at the nude beach. Bad. She tried to blow me. But. I. Just. Can't. Saddest day of my life.
Is there any chance of you maybe wanting a bouncy house at your wedding. Like maybe a .0001 chance. If so I would totally chip in for that.
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
Randomize
