At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Randomize
