So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
Saw my boss's vagina at that party. Hung over at work has never been more acceptable
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
he had hair everywhere except his balls
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
He stopped me mid-blow job to say that his new year's resolution was to stop hooking up. MID FUCKING BLOW JOB.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
Randomize
