Is it sad that the only reason I haven't lapsed into depression is that I'm prettier than her?
Nah, we all need something.
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
I'm so hungover even the car commercials make me nauseas
i woke up to my roommate spraying cooking spray on my legs. fourth time this has happened. not cool.
Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
I said I wanted my dignity back. He brought my thong to me after sharpie-ing "dignity" on the front. I'm not sure if I should me mad or impressed.
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
I woke up to the smell of shame and vomit in my hair... went to the bathroom to shower and passed out... woke back up naked with the blow dryer on... thanks for making my birthday a success
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