i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
Oh god it's open bar.
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
Randomize
