some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
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