plz talk dirty to me
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
you were so high you spent the rest of the night smelling pepper to prove you can sneeze with your eyes open
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
Randomize
