would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
we're about an hour out, how's the weather?
cloudy with a chance of strippers and cocaine, you're favorite. welcome home.
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
my mom went out and bought me new sheets and redecorated my room. its like she's more excited for me to get laid tomorrow for the first time in two months than I am.
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
When you're all settled in, text me, and I can sorta apologize for saying that your phone can suck my dick. What I really meant to say is that your Windows phone can suck my Android phone's dick.
Was having relations of the behind variety with my girlfriend. Based on where we were at I could see myself in the bathroom mirror. You know I did the Patrick Bateman point and wink at the mirror and turned on sissudio by Phil Collins.
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
Randomize
