areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
He wouldn't let me leave his house until he made me orgasm once for every year I've been alive. The birthday sex song did not prepare me for this.
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
My ex-fiancee UPS-ed me a sixer of tall boys, and a fifth of bourbon for christmas, from halfway across the country. What does this mean?
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
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