I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
He told me he wanted to sleep but I touched his penis and listened to his heart beat start racing. I knew sleeping was bullshit.
Use your nursing skills for good, not evil.
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
Sorry I disappeared. Do you hate me?
Not at all, did you not hear me clapping outside your car on our way out?
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
Is it weird that my ex and the dude I'm talking to now both only have one testicle? Apparently I've found my type..
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Randomize
