What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
I feel like I could be a daytime drinking legend, like they could put that shit on my tombstone and right now your preventing me from reaching my full potential
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
Asking the cop for directions wearing a lion mask may not have been my best moment...
Nothing says 'good morning' like waking up only to realize this chick was watching you sleep. She's crazy
Im drunk on a hayride surrounded by toddlers. they are judging me.
Things I just found under my covers: protein bar, string cheese, vibrator.
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
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