something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
Y'all let us switch shirts in the middle of 200 people....why did you let me get this drunk by noon?
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
Randomize
